One of the oft-unspoken worries of my clients facing foreclosure or the need to seek bankruptcy protection is what they tell their children and family. But just as critical is the other side of this coin--the effect on children of financial trouble and the resulting disruption of their lives and expectations.
The January 31, 2011 New York Times published a heart-wrenching piece entitled Teacher, My Dad Lost His Job. Do We Have to Move? It illustrates the problem, from the viewpoint of schoolteaches. I recommend it. One of the points that emerges is that children have "eagle ears" and always know when their parents are in financial trouble, and their fears for the future are at least as great if not greater than those of their parents.
This underscores the advice I have given my clients who are parents: don't try to hide what is going on from your children, because it will only make matters worse for them and you. I advocate a carefully considered approach that can help them to understand what is happening as part of a family. See my article "What to tell the kids when financial problems loom large" for some helpful approaches and thoughts from a non-psychologist.
No comments:
Post a Comment